About The Author
“Meet Gary Guest. His family and friends consider him a storyteller. And now this storyteller is anxious to share his tales with the rest of the world. In this, his first offering, “Fertilizer For The Funnybone,” Guest hopes to induce laughter from all its readers. Some of the short stories and anecdotes will make you think and reflect on a simpler time not that many years ago. Almost all of the content you find here centers around Guest’s agricultural life.
Gary and his wife Denise have called southern Illinois home all their lives in and around Washington County. There they have raised four children and ten grandkids (so far). Their small grain and cattle farm sustains their family and faith first lifestyle and creates more than enough incidents for the author to make fun of himself. Gary loves making new friends and is fond of saying, “I have friends all over the world…Most of them I just haven’t met yet.”
You’ll make a new friend when you laugh along with Fertilizer For The Funnybone.
Published Books
On September 28, 1924, German immigrants Henry and Ella Borgman arrived in New York Harbor along with hundreds of others who dreamed of a better life in America. A year later, on their route home across the Brooklyn Bridge in the middle of a New York City traffic jam, Ella goes into labor and gives birth to a son. They name him Brooklyn “Brooks” Borgman after the bridge which, to them, embodied the American “can-do” attitude they had come to love. Life wasn’t easy for the Borgman's, but they trust “the good Lord,” work hard and “get by with a little help from their friends” in the small town of Anomie, Kansas where they are forced to move after the depression. Henry becomes an airplane mechanic and Brooks starts spending lots of time with Dad at the hangar where he develops an aptitude for flying planes. Shortly before his 19th birthday, Brooks is drafted into the army during World War II. It soon becomes apparent that both the providence that ordered his parents’ lives and his own has been preparing him for his time in the service. Brooks quickly distinguishes himself as the best of his class and is pressed into dangerous duty. Against overwhelming odds, Brooks selflessly volunteers to put himself in harm’s way to aid a crucial mission, earning him the love of his fellow soldiers and the respect of his superiors. It will also win him the hearts and admiration of his countrymen but will he live to see it?
$14.99
DISCLAIMER: The views represented in this book are not necessarily the views of the United States Department of Agriculture. BUT THEY SHOULD BE! In the increasingly competitive and challenging world of farming, surely a book is needed to educate farmers on how to increase their crop yields. Okay, so this isn’t that book. Or…is it? What if what every farmer really needs is just a good laugh?
Gary Guest or “Double G” as he’s known, loves three things: 1. Being a farmer; 2. Dirt; and 3. Making people laugh. In Fertilizer For The Funnybone, he’s fulfilled that mission in sowing a collection of humorous anecdotes, poems, and witty one-liners sure to reap a bountiful harvest of laughter. Guest also loves his wife of 40 years who plays a prominent role in the book, as well as serving as his “typist, editor, conscience and sometimes waitress.” Whether you’re a lifetime farmer or a city-slicker, you’re sure to love this book and the author ’s infectious and delightful brand of self-deprecating humor. From “Me a writer? That might be a stretch” to “You might be a Cattleman if…” to the “Dear Double G” not so sage advice columns, this book lives up to its name!
$12.99
Back for the second round of belly roars, Gary Guest is still dishing up the humor by dishing on the hilarious events in his life as a farmer. Roll with Gary as he tells tales that are almost too funny to be true…but not quite…because most of them are true!
$14.99
Coloring and activity on the farm with Gary Guest.
Can you solve the puzzles and color within the lines? Can you name the farmer and his animals?
This coloring and activity book will keep you busy for hours and have you laughing at the same time.
$14.99
